(made rebloggable by request)
Okay I’m having a lot of Louis feelings right now, so I’m just going to use this opportunity to ramble about him in particular okay great awesome:
First of all I am very (unnecessarily) emotionally invested in Louis, like to a point where I can see certain gif sets of him and feel pangs of longing in my heart and it’s all because I feel like he’s the most human of the boys, if that makes sense?
On X-Factor he was so insecure and he overcompensated with loud laughter and jokes but you could tell he was just scared and didn’t know how to handle anything and so he tried to seem like the bravest, like, maybe he could feel like the boys were leaning on him for support rather than the other way around, like he could be the one holding all of them together even though he seemed so unsure and unraveled.
And he still doesn’t seem fully comfortable with all of it, you can tell things get to him because he lets things show; if he’s angry or annoyed or sad or would rather be somewhere else, you can tell because it’s written all over him, in his face and in the way he holds himself. He has this incredible honesty almost, like he may overcompensate and hide underneath laughter, but you can always tell what’s lying there underneath everything. He puts it out there for you if you look close enough.
And when he talked about his parents’ divorce in that documentary, or when he talked about Harry getting hate, or when he talks about missing his sisters, like whenever he speaks up about being down it’s because he cares too much about other people, it’s never about him. He wants everyone around him to feel like he’s always there for him and the reality that he’s actually not tears him apart you can just see it all over him godDAMNIT
The great thing is that none of this is a ‘flaw’ to me. Because being insecure sometimes and trying to find ways to not be, trying to hide it somehow because other peoples’ feelings matter more to you than your own, all of this is not a flaw, it’s the way a lot of people are and the fact that Louis clearly is okay with feeling that way and letting that show is really fucking cool and when I think about him like that, I just feel like I’ve always got somebody on my side.
Basically Louis breaks my fucking heart on the daily and I love him to pieces because he’s real and vulnerable and relatable and human and he’s just so clearly not ashamed of being any of that.